Thursday, November 4, 2010

Glorious Slayer of Beasts and Vermin

With the small fortune of store credit to Bed Bath & Beyond we were gifted for our wedding, we purchased an OXO brand flyswatter.* This was a relatively extravagant purchase at $6 or $7, but its length and durability made it an irresistible addition to our lives.  And let me just say, I have been glad of it ever since.

Now let’s get something straight: at some time or other we’ve all bought or at least used the cheapest flyswatters that money can buy and are acutely aware of their inherent weaknesses.  Our swatter is nothing of the sort.  It is not the kind where you swing and the flimsy wire-hanger handle bends, nor the kind where the business end is so floppy you may as well use paper, but the kind you can hold with both hands if need be, the kind you could pull a muscle without damaging, the kind you could kill a wasp with, the kind you can snick flies out of midair with—the kind you can believe in.  Even in Oklahoma, many a 6- or 8-legged creature was neatly smacked, scooped up, and disposed of.  One time I even used it to usher an intruding frog to the door and flick him through it.  My preferred method for the larger bugs is an initial light, stunning smack followed by a jab or side chop (it’s cleaner that way).

To make the sport a little more interesting, there is a small hole in the swatter.  This fly-shaped hole offers airborne insects an unrealistic—but theoretically possible—second chance at life.flyswatter

As you can imagine, since we moved to Nicaragua, this wonder has gotten even more use with the weekly roach killings, quarterly tarantula killings, and daily fly, mosquito, or other small pest killings.  I loved it before we moved here.  Now I don’t know how we would ever live without it.  As you can see in the photo, it has done its job well.  I love it so much that I should maybe name it.

*If you’re not familiar with OXO, virtually all of their products are made of or coated with a resilient rubbery, silicony material.  As a side note, I don’t believe this flyswatter is sold anywhere anymore.

1 comment:

  1. Oh,man! I was getting ready to write it on my Christmas wish list. A really good fly swatter is an invaluable tool, and now you tell me it's also inaccessible! I hope you continue to enjoy yours for years to come. It sounds like its construction will allow for that.

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